The Curve Ball.

Last Wednesday, life threw me a (yet, another) curve ball.  While I knew it was probably coming, my daughter was diagnosed as highly autistic.  What I wasn’t expecting was the news that there is concern she is also having tiny seizures and needs to be tested for that.  Scary, to say the least.

I think I was numb to it all until two days ago.

As a single mom of two toddlers, life is VERY BUSY.  Not a lot of time to sit with my thoughts or really process news like I received. So, as I have found, emotions/grief can creep up and surprise me at unlikely times.  Writing helps me process and is very therapeutic for my mind and soul, so I really need to start doing more of that.  Maybe some here, and in journaling.

Anyway, two days ago we went to a fun little picnic that my aunt’s chiropractic center was putting on (I know, so random).  It was great, a beautiful day to boot.  But, there was enough time at the picnic and on the 1 hour round-trip commute for me to be able to think and for the sadness to bubble up and overflow.

So. Many. Tears.

 

It needed to happen (the crying release) and I felt a bit better after, but sheesh.  I am learning about autism, but there is soooooo much I don’t know.  I know even less about the seizures, but I now feel like someone is strangling my heart every time I see her stare off.  I didn’t realize how painful it can be waiting for answers or a cure when your child is not well.  I want answers YESTERDAY!

So where I sit today is learning.  Learning about Autism Spectrum Disorder, learning about seizures and learning patience. None of which is easy.  But life isn’t always easy.  Thanks for letting me share a bit of my heart here today (if anyone is reading, haha😄).  Let’s learn together!

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14 thoughts on “The Curve Ball.

  1. Hi friend, you are definitely not alone and I know exactly how you are feeling. 💜We are in this together. Those tears, as cleansing as you felt afterwards. Know that you are going to have those moments and its ok. What an amazingly strong woman you are. Jacquelynn, I absolutely admire your Faith, and example you are setting for your beautiful Children.
    💜 You my Friend

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thank you for sharing. I’m sure it’s a lot to process! These curve balls make us grow; rediscover; redefine ourselves.
    Sending you love & strength. Breathe. Be patient. ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

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